Pearls and Old Hat


Saturday was the day of Mamas’ birthday gathering.  Her birthday is on Tuesday, but it is much easier to gather on a weekend.  Usually when the family gathers, I spend a week, planning with my sisters and then a day and a half cooking.  The morning of such an affair is busy and we are chatting back and forth about the details.  This morning, the rabbitpatch kitchen was quiet.  The pots and pan were tucked in the cupboards . . .and the stove was cold.  It was an unnatural  occurrence  and how odd it felt!

I had known for days that I could not carry this “plague of  flu” to my loved ones, and though I was disappointed, I had not taken fully into account, all that meant.  I knew that my sister Delores and my daughter Jenny were as capable as could be to to  pull the thing off,  and I took comfort in that, but  in the late morning hours,  like a small child, I thought “I can’t go the party and I just want to break something!”  


Thankfully, I did not act on my childish impulse.           

It seems to me that the old saying about “a first time for everything” rang true again for me, on this day.  I heard it loud and clear disturbing my peace. 

In youth, I was full of notions, and expected new and unfamiliar, like rain.  I even look forward to it.

Everything is so exciting, in that season -until it is “familiar” . .   then it becomes “like an old hat”.  We rush on, til at long last, we are all grown up, we think, and have so very much knowledge, we are quite prepared for whatever comes along. This is a very temporary state of being, we all find out.  . . for things beyond our wildest imagination, happen and there is a wide range of events -some so very beautiful and others shocking and tragic. . . but now we know-and so we convince ourselves again that we really are grown up now and know more than ever   how to proceed  .  . .false start!  For, life seems to gain speed and zips by at a  quickened pace.   It has always amused me, that with all of the modern conveniences, we seem to have less time.  . . We are busy rushing.  We are gathering and discarding constantly.  Our castles are lined with “fools’ gold” and we no longer know where the “pearls” are.

Now, most every life has some lull, here and there . . .and the next thing you know, you like that.  The thrill of “first times” dims for us and “the old hat ” becomes so very lovable.   . . and at long last, we have learned the difference in “fools’ gold and pearls. 


Now, by all accounts, the gathering was wonderful and I can say first hand, that the food was worthy of compliments, for Delores dropped us a box of  ample portions, on the porch, just like Jenny did for Tres. Brant and Jenny sent pictures, too.

 If you think you will be exempt from “loving an old hat”, you are probably wrong.  The heart tucks away those beautiful pearls and old hats, for a good reason, as a kindness, to serve us when needed.  This is really incredible, for we are often unaware .  

When light was fading, there wasn’t a bit of tantrum, left in me.  Like everyone else, I am still growing up and know less now than I ever have, for knowledge and wisdom are two very different things.  No matter how old we get, there are still going to be more “first times”, – and I do hope to muster more grace for that, in the future. 

Though, I suspect that I am a slow learner . . I do have a sizable collection of pearls , and I am known for wearing an old hat  every chance, I get.



Happy Birthday Mama!

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23 thoughts on “Pearls and Old Hat

  1. Oh on.I’m so sorry you missed the grand affaire but there will be more because your family is always having such a wonderful time. I can asure you …you were missed.
    ps…your Mom has me by 3 years


  2. You were noble for not spreading your germs. Your family is so loving, taking pictures to share with you and bringing party food to you.

    As the old saying goes, your mother and I “are the same year’s chillen” (children). I’ll be 78 in December. Your mom is lovely. I liked the cake — you can tell someone put a lot of love into it.

    Hope you are feeling much better now.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. It is sad to miss something you have looked forward to, but it is wonderful that you did not possibly make your parents ill. Because of vertigo and dizziness my entire life I have missed many things. It truly is sad to have to sit alone at home while others enjoy a family function or other event. I like Anne (who commented above) will be 78 in December. Happy belated Birthday to your precious Mama. Love and hugs to you and your family.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I am so sorry you had to miss the party Michele! That had to be hard. Add, being sick to it and I totally understand feeling the desire to break something.
    Hope you are feeling better! Like Anne, I am glad you were able to have some of the goodies!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ryan’s first step.
    Brynn’s first day of school.
    Lyla’s first tooth.

    These firsts will fly past at phenomenal speeds.

    Lyla’s first boyfriend.
    Ryan’s first job.
    Brynn’s first day of college.

    These firsts will not be the lasts.

    Love to the warren,



  6. Oh, Michele, so sorry you had the flu, too! I felt a bit petulant when my recent flu caused a cancellation of a trip to Chincoteague. We had planned to see a NASA rocket launch from Wallops Island, but as it turns out, the launch was cancelled at 5 minutes (& counting) when a part went haywire. I’m sorry you missed your precious mama’s birthday, but I’m sure she is glad not to get the flu! With all the many (many) times you have served up festive occasion meals and treats, I’m sure she know how much you love her! Still, I’m with you, it’s hard to miss out when everyone else is celebrating! Be better (& feel better) SOON! Much love – Virginia 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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